Dave's Dogmatic Tour de France Dribbles

News & Results

07/16/2009| 0 comments
by Dave Osborne
Photo copyright Fotoreporter Sirotti.
Photo copyright Fotoreporter Sirotti.

Dave's Dogmatic Tour de France Dribbles

2009 Tour de France - Stage 12.

2009 Tour de France - Stage 12.

So, MC Hammer is back in green. No need for Thor to worry because MC repeatedly has stated he won’t contest intermediate sprints. What’s this? An imposter in a green jersey sprints past Hushovd at the first sprint of the day. I think its Cipollini! No wait, it's MC.

That’s the last thing this sport needs is liars and cheats. Why would anyone want to attack and gain points, especially in a bike race? Everyone needs to remain calm, sit back and ride with team Astana. At least we know there won’t be any attacks from them. Isn’t that right Alberto? 

The French have unleashed the hounds. No doubt this is in response to MC’s vicious attack at the sprint line. An attack dog came out of the shadows and has taken down Benoit Vaugrenard instead of MC Hammer (since they are colorblind).

All the while seven racers have crept away from the peloton. Martinez is with them adding color to the group by wearing polka dots. There is a minor skirmish between king of the mountain Martinez and second place wanna be king Pellizotti. The peloton isn’t much interested in anything.

Nicki Sorensen (SAX) gets ambitious and decides to leave the lead group. Is anyone from his home country of Denmark cheering him on? Well, maybe fellow countryman and Roadcycling.com manager Thomas Valentinson is.  Calzati joins Nicki but it doesn’t last long. Sorensen is possessed at this moment and seems to be going faster. He solo’d in for all the glory! There’s mayhem in the streets of Denmark. Unfortunately they can’t go too far on their small island country (they have to swim when they leave). They might get as far as Fyn.

The way I see it, this is a good time to ring Thomas and ask for a raise. I’m sure he’s in a good mood if I can just catch him before he leaves dry land!

Now would likely also be a good time to call Thomas to book an ad campaign on Roadcycling.com if you want a special offer.

Two great ways to support us here at Roadcycling.com are to play our Tour de France Game and not least to sign up for the premium subscription version of our brand new training planner and training diary service.

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